Moving on...

My son is moving out of my house. He's 14, and he's going to live with his dad. While I support this idea, it still tears a huge hole right out of my heart. I know he's only going to be living a few miles away, but I've always been the parent that is closest to him and this is absolutely killing me. I spent the entire afternoon and evening crying yesterday.

I'm pissed that all we ask him to do is HIS homework, and HIS one chore- putting out the recyclables every day. He thinks my husband is "riding him" by telling him to do these two things. Well, he wouldn't have to "ride him" about doing them if Brandon would just DO them, when we ask him to, instead of ignoring or hoping we'll forget. He's basically a good kid, and I just don't understand why he couldn't just do the simple things to keep himself out of trouble. I know he has grown to dislike his step-dad. He's a teenage boy whose dad doesn't live here and I knew eventually he'd start to resent that.

I certainly hope he doesn't think he's getting a "get out of jail free card" by moving. There are several factors in play regarding that now. His dad has a new girl friend, who practically lives with him now, and she doesn't have kids. His dad was always the more strict of the two of us as parents, and he's very concerned about Brandon's grades since he's in high school now. Brandon can't get away with leaving his airsoft BBs all over the floor like he does here. He can't leave messes in the kitchen like he does here, because mom won't be there to clean it up. I let him get away with a lot over the years, not because I was spoiling him, but because he's never given me a reason to stay on his case about stuff and because I wasn't working outside the house, so it didn't bother me to take care of everything for the kids.

Part of me hopes he'll HATE it over there and want to come back. The other part of me just wants him to be happy, to thrive as an adolescent and grow into a good man. It really just hurts at this point, even if it is for the best.