High-School type BS and jealousy

No, this isn't another HauntSpace rant. :) It's a work-related rant, pertaining to some of the people I have to spend 8 hours a night, 4 nights a week with.

High school for me was 20 years ago - seriously, our 20-year reunion was in July this past summer. I didn't like it then, and I don't like the same kind of asinine behavior coming from certain people now.

I don't make friends in person very easily. Acquaintances, yes... have tons of them, but friends? People I think I can count on and who listen to me when I need them? No, those are very few and far between for me. I don't have the big social circle that I used to have, so being thrown into a work situation gave me one again. I'm a really nice person. I smile at everyone, even people I don't really care for. I say hi to anyone I make eye contact with. I try to make people feel at ease and cheer up those who seem down. I always ask if they're all right when they look ill or sad. I am just one of those people who care. Shoot me, oh FSM, shoot me - I dare to care!!!!

I work with my sister for the Evil Empire. We even work in the same department, which gives me plenty of time with her to catch up and all. That's all fine and dandy with me. She is the one person that I knew I could talk to there and I already knew everything about everybody who worked there well before I even set foot in the store. People don't realize this though. They think I'm some naive chick who doesn't "get" things, or that since I haven't worked there as long as most of them that I don't "know" things. I know a lot. I am a watcher, a listener. I tend to pay attention to small things, and hear the things that weren't spelled out. Seriously, sometimes I think I should have either gone into the mental health field or the Forensics field. I like details.

Anyway, For the first few weeks, I pretty much kept to myself, aside from hanging with my sister during our lunches and breaks. Now, she is one of those people who has had issues with a lot of the people there. Mostly it's because she is a hard worker and expects the same from her coworkers. When they play around all the time and she's picking up their slack, it's a problem. She also tends to get wrapped up in the personal crap of other people who she THINKS are friends, and it ends up badly every time. Long story short - the problem was solved with moving her to a new department, but the nagging issues remained - people don't like her. So in turn, I felt that several of them don't like me either, simply because I am her sister, even though she and I aren't really much alike and I have never done ANYTHING to anyone there. Even on my first day (granted, I don't think anyone knew who I was), half those people wouldn't even acknowledge me or look me in the eye. I think some of them are realizing though that I am not her or that I'm alright for a new girl on the block and at least say hi now.

The problem now it seems, is that I AM a nice person. Not saying my sister is not a nice person, she IS - she is a kind and generous person who will go out of her way to help someone when they need it. But she also has an attitude that rivals many a Tasmanian Devil. Love her to death (I know you're reading this Babs), but I don't say anything about anyone that I wouldn't say to their face, and she knows it. When someone pisses her off, she doesn't forget and I don't think forgiveness is high on the list either. They call me the "Nice" sister, she's the "Mean" sister.

I am WAY nice though. I like to form my own opinions. I listen to what people have to say and watch their actions, THEN I base my opinions on that - very rarely do I go on hearsay. I came into this job knowing a lot of what goes on in the store, which should have prejudiced me to an extent. I met the people I'd heard so much about. Some of them I like, some I don't really care to be around, and a lot of them I just don't know enough about to form an opinion about. It's all just dependent on how they act toward me, or what kind of vibe I get from them. I like some people that she does not like, and she likes some people that I don't really want to be around. It's fine, we're different people, we can't like everything the same.

The previous is all basic background for what is bugging me.

I have a friend now, someone outside the "circle" that my sister talks to, and apparently it's an issue. People talk bad about him, some even try to start crap with him. I just don't see why they can't just leave the kid alone. (He's young enough to be my son, BTW.) Most of them haven't bothered to listen to him or talk to him for any length of time or get to know him at all. The only thing they think he knows how to do is be loud, talk sports and handle a pallet jack, sometimes in a dangerously fast fashion. A few of them, including my sister, used to talk to him, but they don't anymore. I think it's a mutual dislike now.

Anyway, I made the effort to get to know him. He's a sensitive kid, very sweet, very helpful and he just needs someone to listen. Of course, he hit on me the first time we ever really talked for more than 5 minutes. I was warned he'd do that, from a few people, so I expected it and quickly made it clear that he ain't got a chance in Hell with me. I make it clear every opportunity that I feel it necessary. I am pretty sure that he knows by now. He doesn't bother with trying anymore, which is a good sign. I also tell my husband everything significant that goes on in the store, including with my new friend. Of course, a lot of the store thinks that I've already given up the nookie to the kid since I spend a good deal of lunch times ( Steak N Shake... Mmmmmmm!) and breaks with him, which is fine, I don't give a rat's ass what any of them think. I give him what he needs more than sex - someone to LISTEN to him. It's what I am good at. I like to listen to people. I like to try to help with feedback if I can. He doesn't have many friends, I think I and another guy at work are about it for his social circle. I listen to EVERYONE though. He's not the only one, he just gets more of my attention because he's around me more than everyone else. So, here is the problem: everyone else at the store can't stand him. My sister complains about him, my other coworkers complain about him, a couple of them are even jealous of him! (As IF ANY of them have a chance with me, PUH-LEASE!) Nobody there has a right to tell me WHO I can talk to or hang out with. If they don't like it, they don't have to be around me either. The only thing I ask of anybody is that they (A) Don't judge me just because I like the kid and (B) don't talk shit about him in front of me. I wouldn't do it to them about their friends, and I don't expect that treatment from them.

I was so pissed off with several people yesterday that I almost just decided not to speak to ANY of them again, including my own sister (at least while at work). There's more to the story, but I won't go into any of that. I just try to remember something one of my coworkers told me - she said for me to remember that I was put into his life for a reason. I believe that. I'm the only one who can calm him down when he needs it (temper, good grief he has a bad temper). I feel like I'm the only one there that truly cares about him. I'm the one who LISTENS. What is so wrong with that? Why does everyone feel the need to shove their noses into it? I know the kid has a crush on me - everyone knows that. Doesn't mean we can't be friends and it damn sure doesn't mean I've already jumped in the sack with him. He's not my type, not in my age range, and just doesn't "do it" for me. He knows he won't ever get me. It's simple. His feelings might get hurt, but that's life. I enjoy his company. He spoke to me when no one else cared to. Not a damn person in the store outside of our department made ANY effort to get to know me until after he did (sisters don't count). He watches out for me, helps me if I need it, and tries to keep me in a good mood. I do the same for him. Why does there have to be drama about that?

I totally just do not get how people can constantly give their ill-founded opinions when they don't take the time to understand things before shooting off at the mouth. It makes me sick and it makes me not even want to bother with any of them. If people, including family, would bother to pay real attention to things, they'd be a little less apt to jump to conclusions and be mean to people who really don't deserve it. I can do without snarky attitudes from people. All it does is make things worse and cause bad feelings all around. I don't like feeling that way at all. My husband is the only one who has a right to say ANYTHING about who I talk to, and he just wants to make sure the kid knows he'll kick his ass if he crosses the line with me. Perfectly acceptable to me and my buddy knows it. Shouldn't that be enough for everyone else? I never thought I was THAT much in demand that people have to freakin' fight over me. It's just ridiculous some things that people say and do, yet they call ME rude? Whatever. High school is over, was a long time ago. Time to grow up people.