Haunt Space, revisited

*sigh*

This is just ridiculous, the whole thing. I've been getting emails and messages asking all sorts of questions, people telling me all sorts of things.. apparently Pete's latest rant on the forums there has people all riled up again. I've been trying to just forget about the drama since stating my piece here. Now I'm going to clear up any misunderstandings that involve me with what's obviously still going on there, starting from the beginning.

Please forgive my memory, it's never been that great and I will probably screw up some accounts of the story since I didn't document everything and a lot of the issues' words were wiped clean by Pete in his efforts to reduce the drama. Pete won't name names, and I will only name the ones that everyone knows about and keep what's said in private locked away.

On the 30th, I posted a blog about the breast cancer drive. I used the word "boobies" and some humor and posted a link to the original blog rather than post the whole blog over again since it was rather tongue in cheek and I knew it wouldn't fly at Haunt Space. I figured if the other breast cancer drive could be posted a few months ago, then I could post the one our group was working on too.

Some time during the night, my blog was replied to, then deleted by Pete. This was his attempt to stem potential problems and he didn't want the word "boobies" causing Haunt Space to show up in searches and what not. He posted this on the forum section of Haunt Space, without names, instead of just PMing me and letting me know. Now, I normally do not even look at the forum, but that post was showing on the home page, so out of curiosity, I read it. Then I told my Garage of Evil friend, Steve, about it since he was the one leading the charge for this.

This is my email to Steve after I copied Pete's post to him:

"He's referring to "boobies" as used in my blog post which he removed. It's fine, I just wish he'd have PM'ed me rather than go the public route when it only deals with 2 blogs, mine and yours (which he obviously left alone). I PMed him and apologized for my lack of good judgment thinking that a word that every child I know used would be okay in this instance. Love Pete to death, but he's way too much of a worrier. "

I asked him not to say anything in a following email and that I would handle it because he does have a temper. Then I replied directly to Pete on the forum. I knew that anyone who read the blog knew whose blog Pete was referring to, and I had no problem with people knowing it was me. My problem was that I felt it should have been handled privately rather than Pete posting on the forum and expecting us to A. see it and B. not be upset at basically being called out in front of everyone. I was also quite surprised that anyone would be upset over my using the word "boobies". The next thing I know, I get an email from Steve saying "Too late". He'd already replied as well on the forum, and he was not as nice as I was.

The next thing I know, several people are slinging insults all over the place. I did NOT want anyone else involved in this, and I knew as soon as Pete posted that on the forum that people would do their usual butting in, whether they think they are helping or not. It NEVER ends up well when things are thrown into the light like that. Thinking back, I wonder how Pete hasn't realized this yet.

A little while later, I found out WHO complained about my blog, although Pete led me to believe it was through replies to my blog. Grimdaddy posted his own blog, unhappy with my wording, with PAHalloweenFreak backing him up as always. He claims to not have attacked me, but I will never know because I was not allowed to deal with this myself, thanks to Pete's trigger-happy fingers and good intentions.

Pete and I PMed a couple of times, I apologized for my lack of good judgement and he apologized for any offense taken. Unfortunately, I was pretty pissed off still, especially after I head more about WHO was involved in creating this problem.

There was some discussion on the Garage of Evil group about the incident thanks to a reply to a message that was supposed to be offlist. It was rather short lived though as we really prefer to leave the drama out of our treehouse.

Meanwhile, I removed all the content off my page and replaced my icon with a cloth pattern. I was pissed off, and I figured I'd rather just take it all down to give myself something to do rather than end up typing more words and getting more pissed. This was my way of cooling off. I also changed my dislikes and put something about disliking hypocrites. It's a genuine dislike of mine.

I was gone from home on that same afternoon/evening as I had to pick up some wallwarts from a guy I went to high school with in Jacksonville for our Florida Haunters gatherings (to have a stock of them for whomever needed them), so I was gone for almost 3 hours with the drive out there during rush hour, his being late, then helping him jump his truck off because his battery died.... plus some errands after that. I got home, cooked dinner, then watched a movie with my husband and went to sleep. I never bothered to check the computer, I just wanted to forget about it.

The next day, I awoke to a surprise in my email with info from other people. Some time during the evening, Pete posted another message on the forum stating (this is paraphrased) "Anyone that questions my decisions or embarasses me on hauntspace will be banned, and i'll be checking pages for any wise comments regarding this and you will be banned too." I also got notifications from hauntspace saying I had messages there, one from Pete too, so I went to check them. SURPRISE!!! I can't sign in. I got banned during the night while I was sleeping. Steve posted to Pete to remove him the day before and he got his request granted. I had no intentions of leaving at all, but I was shown the door.

So I ended up getting ready for a job interview while trying to keep the tears out of my eyes and keep my voice from cracking when my husband was asking me what was wrong. How the hell did all this escalate while I was SLEEPING?

What irks me about this is that Pete knows my email address. We've known each other on the 'net since both our daughters were in diapers. Yet he still chooses to do things in an ass-backward fashion. He could have emailed me and let me know what's going on. He could have waited for a response to his PM before kicking me off. Some people don't spend every waking hour on the computer.

So later that day, another GoE member posted a blog since we were still trying to raise the money for the breast cancer thing. He posted it in a very unoffensive manner. Next thing we know, he's got the boot too - while he was away in Salem, he had no idea what was going on after leaving on Friday afternoon.

During all this, several people from Haunt Space joined the GoE group to keep in touch with those of us who were banned. This was not a disloyalty to Pete or HauntSpace, but a way to still keep in touch with the 3 of us who were no longer members there.

RavenLunatic posted a blog about tolerance/acceptance that day. She WAS attacked by Grimdaddy and PAHF:

"I have been silent through this whole fiasco. I just want to know what this blog has to do with haunting??? It seems to be a political rant. I do believe that you guys have some how managed to draw Pete away from the goals of his site. His TOS even states that he will not tolerate (or "accept") political bantor. Heck my dear RavenLunatic you hardly ever show your face here and now you are taking the fun out of the whole site. I noticed that you are a member at another forum that is hosted by a former member of Haut Space. Did she ask all of you bucket of chaw to come here and rip at another man's website? You don't deserve to be here and should exercise the right to click DELETE that is now found on your page. I came here to make friends in the haunting community and because of you and several others, the front page of the site is filled with garbage. Please do the right thing and go some place where you can kiss a ghostly butt and not destroy others spirits. I am offended by your presence and think you should leave.

By the way....... I did happen to see the original blog, before it was deleted, that started this and I do believe the approach of the charity is off the mark. They seemed more interested in saving anatomical body parts of a woman rather that saving the women themselves. After all, isn't a persons life more important than their individual body parts? I lost my mother and aunt to this terrible affliction.

You all seem hung up on saving the right to use a word that Pete deemed offensive to the site. Shouldn't you use your energy for saving women's lives from breast cancer?!?!?!

Walter C. Wojciechowski"

Now, HOW is it that he can get away with the name calling and insults??? Especially when Pete was so adamant about the rules being followed? How is this??? Rainbow colored smoke is being blown constantly up Pete's derrière I think.

I spent the weekend, while my GoE counterparts were in Salem, doing damage control, and sending emails back and forth with Pete. We finally managed to see each other's points and I thought it was over. I woke up on Sunday morning to hear more bad news - at least two more people were shown the door and now more TOS changes at HauntSpace and anyone who had been banned would NEVER be allowed to come back.

Stunned... I was completely stunned. Suddenly MORE drama is added to the fray. As if there wasn't enough already. Finally, I snapped again after hearing more about what had happened in the past with a certain 2 people and their trouble making and I posted my own blog here and let out every single frustration I had concerning the root of the problem.


I got my response to that finally and replied accordingly. Bitter? Yes, I am. I admit it. It takes a really special person or two to keep my hackles raised like this.

For the rest of the story, I'll post another blog later today. Oh yes... there is more, thanks to yesterday's forum post on HauntSpace.